Throwing Food, Discipline, and a Mommy Time Out

I've talked to a lot of moms and read lots of blogs about kids throwing food. It is nice to know that my child is not the only one who does this. However, throwing food in our house can be a big problem. We have a small dog with a very sensitive tummy that usually eats any and everything that gets thrown on the floor. Needless to say this becomes an issue for me because the dog is 1)gaining weight and 2)needing to use the restroom more often than usual. Ryan thinks it is a game, he throws food on the floor and the dog and I scramble to get the food. Lucy (the dog) usually gets there first. I've told Ryan numerous times,"Don't throw food!" Then when the next piece flies, I remove all food from his tray and figure he must be full or doesn't like what is on the menu for this meal. This food throwing doesn't just take place at home. I feed Ryan snacks while grocery shopping to keep him from climbing out of the cart. (Whose kid is this, I mean really I was a model child!!) Most of the time, like today, he will shake the cup and the snacks fly out and onto the floor of the store. Any Cheerios or crackers that have fallen next to where he is sitting get thrown out too. Ryan will just pick them up and off they go to the floor. At first I thought he was doing this to get a reaction from me, positive or negative, so I would ignore this behavior, hoping it would stop within seconds seeing that he got no reaction from mom. No such luck, so I took the cup and told him, "All done." Enter crazy kid that, I swear, cannot be mine. He screams and cries at the top of his lungs and starts to climb out of the cart. This signals to me, time to go to the checkout line! And here is the part I don't get about grocery stores. So with one hand I am holding my crazy kid in the cart (yes he is strapped in, Houdini Ryan knows how to wiggle out of the belt, oh and did I mention he is strapped into the cart cover AND the shopping cart belt, yeah he can get out of both when he is determined to do so)and trying to unload the groceries onto the moving belt with my other hand. All the while,the checker is looking at me like,'Come on lady I don't have all day, there is a line behind you that stretches to aisle 10!' I'm wondering why people don't see a mom in distress and offer to help? That is a whole other issue, along with the people who park to close to your car so you can't open your door wide enough to put your baby in on the side that their carseat is on.

AAHHH!!!! Okay, so the throwing has gone from food to other objects like toys. We play in Ryan's room and he walks around, picks up toys and throws them at me or Sanjay or over the gate that traps him in his room. Last week Ryan threw a toy and Sanjay didn't move fast enough and got hit in the eye. I have started to implement time outs. Now I know what you are thinking, he is 14 months old, he doesn't get it, are you crazy? Sanjay and I have been over this and he feels like Ryan won't get it. But I am a firm believer that we need to start now and not wait until he "gets it" and then put him in a time out. What my perception of a timeout for a 14 month old is I pick up whatever was thrown and take it away from him. Sit him down, look him in the eyes and tell him, "Don't throw toys, you hurt (Insert name here). I then try to get him to sit for a minute then I talk to him again and show him that he hurts people when he throws things. (A little tip borrowed from Super Nanny) Some days this works, and other days he is left with nothing to play with because we have taken all the toys away. It sounds harsh, but I don't want to be that mom on Maury Povich or Jerry Springer 15 years from now and is scared to death of my son because he throws, hits, kicks and punches.

After my long morning today, as I'm putting away groceries and Ryan is drinking his milk, I knocked applesauce out of the refrigerator and onto the floor for the second time in 3 days. It was everywhere! Then I looked up at my sweet boy who I thought was drinking his milk, but was actually creating milk puddles on the tray of his highchair. Mommy timeout was all I could think! I put Ryan in his exersaucer (Thanks Kari!) where he would not harm himself and I sat down and had a snack in peace. I just needed 5 minutes without screaming and food throwing and milk puddles to clear my head and catch my breath. When my time was up, I finished cleaning up the applesauce, rescued my boy from the exersaucer (he was actually playing and having a good time at that point) and took him for a walk. I'm happy that I decided to post not just the good, but the bad and the ugly days too. We are not perfect, everyday is not a great day. I don't want to mislead anyone who actually reads this blog that things are perfect, we are learning as we go. I mean seriously, I haven't even showered today, and it is afternoon already! Welcome to my crazy world!